Last night, I had what my friends and I call a “mevening”. This is sort of what it sounds like: an evening you spend alone, at home, with yourself. I usually spend mine puttering around, doing this and that. A few chores, a bit of reading, a healthy dose of self-care.

Lately, though, I’ve felt like my mevenings haven’t been very intentional. I’ve spent them wasting time on my phone, getting sucked down YouTube rabbit holes and watching mindless TV. Those things are okay sometimes, but I don’t like the feeling that before I know it, it’s time for bed. I hate feeling like I didn’t get to any of the activities that would have made me feel really good, like taking a bath or going for a walk or starting a new book. 

I’ve been watching a lot of MuchelleB’s channel over the past few days, and have felt inspired by the way she organizes her life and uses lists to help her stay on top of things in her personal life as well as her business. I particularly like her idea of a “life admin day”, to take care of all the nagging tasks and feel a sense of calm and clarity going into the week. In short: she uses lists unapologetically, even for tiny things, even in her personal life.

I, on the other hand, have always felt weird about the fact that I wanted or needed a “to-do list” for my downtime. It made me feel like I was “doing self-care wrong” by bringing a productivity approach into my off-hours. On the other hand, I felt awful when I let the time get away from me and succumbed to my laziest tendencies – not because it’s bad to be lazy sometimes, but because the things I do when I’m being lazy are not replenishing. They leave me feeling worse, not better.

So this time I decided to make a to-do list for my mevening. It was short & sweet and very simple: make dinner, have a little spa moment for my tired summer feet, and take notes while I read my book. Nothing fancy, and yes, maybe I’d have gotten to these things anyways. But taking a minute to sit down and set some intentions for my evening made a huge difference. Rather than just reacting to my phone or wandering aimlessly through my night, I could approach the time with more mindfulness. By bedtime, I felt rested, not drained.

The moral of the story is: if it works for you, it works for you. I wasted a lot of time feeling like “I shouldn’t need that”, rather than just giving myself what would make me feel better. This phrase also came up in a client session yesterday, so I know I’m not the only one who struggles with giving themselves what they need, without shame or judgment. Do you?

It’s been a strange summer this year. First, we had chilly weather through June and even on a couple of days in July, which definitely put a damper on the mood of carefree summer beach days. It was also humid as HECK for most of July which made it hard to move/live/breathe. It’s only in August that we’ve had some of those breezy, perfect summer days that felt fresh and pleasant.

Apart from the weather, it’s been strange for me personally for other reasons. I had some whirlwind projects at work that took up a lot of my time, lots of intake calls and meetings, and was managing my ongoing client responsibilities. Then on top of that, we had some bad news in my family, which really turned things upside down and was very stressful for a couple of weeks. Mostly, it was just busy: I had a lot going on at the same time in every area of my life.

Please know that I’m not complaining, I’m just taking inventory of why I’ve felt less engaged with this summer than in years past. Then again, it’s quite possible that I’m looking back on those summers with rose-coloured glasses, that they feel more full and rich in retrospect. Maybe this is how it always is.

For now, though, I’m realizing that I still have time to relish in my summer, my favourite time of year. There are things I can do to soak up the sunshine, put myself in the way of beauty, and spend more time outside. I can have more Ice Cream Socials™ with my friends, and go to Shakespeare in the Park, and maybe even go out on a Pirate Ship before the summer is over.

What’s still on your Summer Bucket List? What could you go slot into your calendar for these last couple weeks? Who can you text to make plans? What do you want to organize? 

Summer’s not over y’all! There’s still time to make some memories. This is as much a note to self as it is an invitation to you.

This is just a little note to remind myself to pay attention to – and honour! – my morning ideas. Maybe you need this reminder too? Let me explain.

For several years now, I’ve started every morning very quietly by putting my phone on Airplane mode before I go to sleep. Not Do Not Disturb, mind you, (that’s always on), but Airplane mode, so my phone is literally disconnected from the world. This means that while my alarm still works, I wake up to a phone without notifications or news or internet access.

From there, I usually move to my couch and do 10 minutes of meditation. Now that I’ve started writing these morning reflections, I also move from my couch to my desk to do those. And THEN, after all that, I allow my phone (and myself) to reconnect to the outside world. Even though sometimes I feel the addicted part of myself want to check social media sooner because it seems more “fun” than doing my good habits, on the whole I feel a million times better for building this digital boundary into my days. 

All this is to say: my mornings are quiet. I don’t have to deal with any stimulation or information from the outside world. And I’ve just been sleeping, and therefore sifting through things subconsciously all night.

So when I get an idea in the morning, or a “ping”, or a download, or an impulse, it’s usually coming from a place of peace and presence. It’s usually right, for lack of a better word. The morning is when I feel most connected to the universe, to the collective unconscious, and to the energy of life. It’s when I’m most open to messages that might come in from a higher plane. 

This morning, I woke up knowing that I need to recover an old footstool in plush coral velvet. Yesterday, I felt like I should re-listen to an old podcast episode. At other times it’s been a feeling I should contact someone, or go somewhere, or just a thought or piece of clarity on something I’ve been struggling with. And these feelings always feel like the absolute right thing to do, like divine timing, like truth.

I don’t know what your mornings are like, but could you make them quieter? Could you make more space for the intuitive hits that you might be trying to pick up on? Can you sit quietly for a few minutes and see what rises to the surface? I know that whenever I do, my life is better for it.