I just finished reading Atomic Habits by James Clear, and this line that he threw in right near the end really jumped out at me. He was explaining that while our goal is always to keep up with our habits (that’s why they’re called habits!), the reality is that life can sometimes get in the way. To mitigate for this reality, his personal rule is to never miss a habit twice. 

I like the simplicity of this rule, but also the way it allows us to have more compassion for ourselves. Not every day allows for every habit. We can accept this as truth and let it be okay. It’s not make-or-break if we can’t get outside on a walk today, or if tomorrow we don’t eat enough green vegetables. It’s okay. It’s normal. It’s life.

Instead, we can commit to starting again tomorrow. We can use our skipped day not as a reason to beat ourselves up, but instead as a reason to show up anew. 

I’m learning this new paradigm very slowly. Historically, I’ve been very all-or-nothing with my goals. If I let something go for a few days, all of a sudden I want to throw in the towel completely. But since I’ve started my Super Seven daily habits (now 8!) and tracking using a gentler habit tracker, I feel more relaxed on the days where I don’t get everything done. I try my best, and let that be enough. I try to do better tomorrow.

So as I write this to you on this very fine Saturday, I am fulfilling my daily habit and not missing twice. Yesterday I didn’t have time to write, but today I do, and today I did. See you again tomorrow.

Right before finally buckling down to type this, I was researching Disney villainess costumes on Pinterest. It occupied me for a while, even though I knew I should be writing my daily observation instead. Then, I opened up a new blog post window and all the other excuses flew into my head:

• I need a cup of tea
• Maybe I should go to the bathroom first?
• Time to get ready! What should I wear?
• Let’s just quickly check what’s on the calendar today
• Did I get any new emails?
• Let me just check my budget & update it with new info

And on and on. The only way to actually get myself typing was to sit still, not listen to any of those urges (albeit after the Pinterest ones), minimize all the other browser tabs and start writing about why I was making excuses not to write.

Here’s the thing: I don’t think I’m ever going to get to the point where I consistently show up to do my creative practice without there being some kind of drama. If you subscribe to the Steven Pressfield school of creativity (and I do), then you know there’s no escaping this part of the process. You won’t want to do it, and you’ll make yourself do it anyways, and you’ll live to create another day. 

The danger is when we think that one day it will be easy. When we think that if we just figure ourselves out enough and develop enough of a routine, we’ll never face resistance again. That belief, more than anything, is what crushes us. There’s no avoiding the annoying, arduous process of struggling with your lazy, distractible self in order to get your butt in that chair. As far as I know, that’s all there is. While it might get easier, I don’t expect it to ever become easy for me.

So here I am again, writing about resistance again, adding it up again, not breaking the chain again. Part of me thinks: how many times can I write about the ways I try to trick myself into not writing? And part of me thinks: as many times as is necessary, if that’s what it takes to wring out all the good stuff, too. The showing up is the most important part. 

PS. As soon as you hit “Publish”, all the other excuses no longer seem as fun or urgent. That’s how you know they were excuses.

Popping in today a bit later than usual because I slept in. On a Wednesday! What a revelation. I’m battling an annoying head cold so it felt necessary to turn off all my alarms and let my body rest. It also happens to be a gloomy, rainy day here in Toronto and my appointments were canceled, so it’s a wonderful day to rest, recuperate, and give my body the chance to heal. After I type this, I plan to take myself back to bed with a book and rule my tiny queendom from underneath the covers.

Catching this cold was a bit of a wake-up call for me. My immune system is usually pretty strong, but after that awful stomach bug/food poisoning incident from a couple weeks ago, it feels much weaker. I caught this cold so easily! It’s an important reminder to take better care of myself and let my immune system build back up.

It’s also a lovely chance to check in and figure out how I can care for myself most effectively. When I’m sick, or tired, or otherwise stressed, what feels healing? What’s the medicine I most need?

Note to self – here are a few of the things that have been feeling like medicine to me:

• Actual medicine. Don’t suffer needlessly! Go to the pharmacy, get yourself some cold & sinus meds, and watch your symptoms melt away
• Group texts with your friends where you get to see their progress and cheer them on
• Your coven of friends. It’s magic to see the shifts that can happen in a space of unconditional love & positive regard
• Sleeping in, taking naps, going to bed early. Nothing works better!
• Reading excellent books and taking notes when necessary
• Taking a break from Instagram
• Mom’s magic potion for when you’re sick
• Keeping your phone on airplane mode longer than usual
• Wearing slippers
• Taking a long hot shower or bath
• Going back to bed and watching Once Upon a Time

And with that, I bid you adieu! Hope you have a beautiful day. xo.