Life In Limbo

Bangkok, Thailand

October 14, 2015

In total, I went to Bangkok five times on my travels, although 3 of those times I was really only in the airport, and 2 out of 3 times I was having a little sleepover at BKK. For me, this enormous city was a bunch of extremes all mixed together. There was the most intense heat, but even-more-intense air conditioning. There were so many people, but so many chances to be almost completely alone. You could go from eating lunch on a tiny plastic stool at a street stall to having drinks on the top of the world in the evening. You could walk down the most obnoxious tourist street in the world and then go home to a hostel in residential Bangkok the same night. There are some of the most spectacular temples in the world, and some of the most amazing skyscrapers. Everything is all mashed up together, making Bangkok an incredibly fascinating city.

The two times I spent time in Bangkok were very different. The first time, with my sister, we tried to see as many of the main attractions as we could manage in only a few short days: the gorgeous temples, views from boats going down the river, the overwhelming and beautiful markets. The second time, I tried to go as slowly as possible, spending an entire day in Lumphini Park listening to podcasts, reading my book, and watching komodo dragons, another day riding a bike around Bangkok’s “green lung”, and my evenings having drinks as high up in the sky as I could manage. On both my visits, I really felt like I got to experience so many sides to the city, even though there’s still so much more I would love to explore.

Favourites:

Vertigo Bar at the Banyan Tree: Without a doubt, this is the best rooftop bar in Bangkok. There are 360 degree views of the city, delicious (though expensive) drinks, and a lovely atmosphere. Just remember that there is a dress code, so no flip-flops.

Cloud 47 Rooftop Bar: This bar is also really nice, but a little less fancy – but there’s still a dress code. We went to this one before Vertigo, which I would recommend lest you be disappointed, but the views here are lovely too.

Baan Nampetch Hostel: I stayed here with my sister, and it was clean, had blissful air-conditioning, two twin beds and was only a 15 minute walk to one of the piers to take the boat to all the tourist sites, 10 minutes to the Golden Mount, and 10 minutes to Khao San road (which we did not really frequent).

U-Baan Guesthouse: Be aware that this hostel is a bit of a hike from the more touristy parts of the city, but the woman who runs this place is kind, funny, and hangs out and drinks beer with her guests. I would recommend renting a room with a friend or two if possible, because the dorms are….cozy to say the least. It’s very close to the SkyTrain, so it’s not far to get to places like Lumphini Park, Silom, and the enormous malls.

Bang Krachao: The green lung of Bangkok! It’s so peaceful and calm here that you feel like you’ve magically been transported to a jungle hours from the big city. You can easily rent bikes in the parking lot of the Talad Nam Peung floating market and then just get lost on the little concrete paths that spiderweb throughout the jungle. It’s not an island (we took a taxi there and back), but it feels like one and is absolutely beautiful. The market has a lot of yummy local treats too!

Jim Thompson House: Yes, it’s worth it to go and look at someone’s house, mostly because it’s a gorgeous house with so much character and history. You have to sign up to go on a guided tour of the house which is a little shorter than I would have liked, an there are no photos are permitted, but it’s still worth it. I wished that we could have had more time to explore the house itself (you can only explore a limited section of the grounds after the tour) but the whole complex is beautiful and for me, very inspiring. Jim Thompson created a lovely, traditional-meets-modern Thai house in the middle of the city and it still feels like an oasis. Ps. there’s a youth discount so don’t forget your ID!

Café Bangrak: This restaurant is near Vertigo, so if you don’t feel like paying their terrifying prices for dinner, just walk over to this tiny adorable place. Most of the time I was in Bangkok, I ate at street stalls, and this is the only restaurant I loved enough to recommend/could even give you directions to. I had the red curry fried rice and it was delicious. I got the recommendation from this great blog post, which suggests some other Thai places that look great too.

Note: I was in Bangkok in late April (the hottest time of year), and then late May (not quite so bad) of this year.

Book Club: August & September

October 7, 2015

This year, every few months I am choosing the books that inspired me or spoke to me the most, and sharing a little bit about them here on the blog. As always, you can see everything I’m reading on my Goodreads profile!

These last couple months were so lovely, because: a) it was Summer, b) I was at my mom’s quiet, cozy house, tucked away in the forest, and c) I had access to a library again! All of which meant that I got to read a lot and it was wonderful, as you can imagine. Here are my favourites from the last few months.

1. Rising Strong by Brené Brown

I adore Brené Brown (just look at all the times she’s inspired me over the years) and I was so excited to read her new book. I devoured it, and the whole time I had my laptop open next to me so I could take pages of notes. It gave me ideas and tools to actually use in my real life and relationships, including my personal faves “The story I’m making up is…” and the concept that everyone is doing the best they can. The stories she includes are so powerful and this book is such a helpful resource for anyone trying to live with more courage and integrity.

2. Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin

I am also a huge fan of Gretchen Rubin: I have read all her books and listen to her podcast every week. She’s very wise and knowledgeable when it comes to happiness, and all her books have been helpful for me. I loved this one in particular because it discusses how to create habits on the basis of your own personality and nature, and that not every habit strategy works for every person. It’s truly helpful and full of awesome information to make your habits (and therefore your life) better and happier. I found myself passionately talking to friends about the 4 tendencies, and applying her recommended strategies to form my own habits.

For example, I’m a Questioner, so I exploited that element of my personality by researching the best strategies for flossing, and coming up with several compelling reasons to do it (“Because it’s good for me” wasn’t enough. “Because it’s the best way to whiten your teeth and improve the health of your mouth and your overall immune system” was much better.) You can take a free quiz about your tendency here.

3. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer

This one was recommended by one of my best friends and I loved it. It’s poignant, it’s sad, it’s full of joy, it tugs at your heartstrings, it’s kind of fantastical, it’s simply beautiful. It’s about a little boy who goes on a kind of scavenger hunt after his father is killed in the terrorist attacks of 9/11, as well as the history of his family and the stories of all kinds of characters he meets along the way. It also has a satisfying ending, which I think is a tough feat in this kind of story.

4. This Is How Your Lose Her by Junot Díaz

This was a short book, but the connected stories were all powerful and interesting and extremely well-written. It’s a bit sad to watch this guy act like a total trainwreck in all of his romantic relationships, but at times it’s really relatable too. It’s excellent fiction by a great writer, and I’m looking forward to reading his other books. You can read an excerpt of the book here.

You can see all my book recommendation blog posts here.

Thoughts on Coconut Milk

October 5, 2015

Coconut Milk >> Life In Limbo

On Friday night, my boyfriend and I made coconut milk, from scratch, in our kitchen with its beautiful view. In many ways, this moment was exactly what I’d been craving for the last few months: having a home of my own, hanging out with this wonderful person, being domestic, eating fresh homemade food, laughing in the kitchen and listening to good music.

At the same time, I think it was an important lesson for me in getting what you want. A friend once reminded me that a year living abroad somewhere fabulous and exotic is still just a year of your life, and I believe that to be absolutely true. Any adventure is still full of ups and downs, and plenty of moments when you’re stuck in your head and your back is aching and you can’t figure out why you feel so tired all the time.

This recent Ecuadorean adventure has already been so wonderful. I have more love in my life, our space makes me feel peaceful and calm, and I feel supported by an awesome human being. Unfortunately, that doesn’t mean my anxiety about the future has disappeared like I so hoped it would, or that I’ve stopped comparing myself to others, or that I don’t almost always feel like I should be doing something more, creating something beautiful, or making something better. In other words: wherever you go, there you and all your anxieties are.

I’m constantly trying to learn how to live a good, rich and satisfying life. So far I know that having such a life means writing your own story (not comparing yourself to others), doing the work that fills you up (not the work that makes the most money or that makes your family the happiest), and cultivating relationships that bring you joy and a chance for personal growth. I’ve learned that it means trying to bring more peace, stillness and fulfillment into every decision and interaction in your life. I know it means getting vulnerable, staying present, practicing gratitude, and working to create beautiful things.

It doesn’t mean that everything will always be easy all the time. It doesn’t mean that you’ll always remember that in this moment, nothing is actually wrong. It doesn’t mean that you won’t ever get worried, or doubt yourself, or feel panicked or confused sometimes. It just means you have to do the work to try and space those moments further apart, and do your best to bounce back from them more quickly.

Coconut Milk >> Life In Limbo

So what does this have to do with coconut milk?

Well, like the pursuit to live your best and most beautiful life, making homemade coconut milk is a true labour of love. You have to lug home some heavy coconuts that will dance around in the trunk of your car. You have to split them open using your hands, a knife and a lot of grit. You have to make a mess. You have to use a butter knife, or a screwdriver, or your fingernails to prise the coconut meat away from its skin. You have to chop it up finely, add the coconut water and some boiling water and overheat your blender by running it for five or more minutes. Then you have to squeeze and strain the pulp by hand until you get your milk.

Also, it takes forever.

Coconut Milk >> Life In Limbo

But, just like the journey to becoming a better and happier human being, the results are totally worth it. Homemade coconut milk, it turns out, is absolutely gorgeous. It’s so creamy it coats the glass, it tastes exactly like fresh coconuts (duh), and it goes well with everything. So far we’ve drunk it straight, mixed it with granola, added it to morning smoothies, and frozen it into ice cubes to save for later. If you’d like to try making your own coconut milk, we followed this recipe to excellent results.

Coconut Milk >> Life In Limbo

As I write this, I’m drinking a glass of our coconut milk, looking out the window and feeling at peace. The writing always helps. Why do I always forget that the writing always helps? New situations are almost always scary and exciting, beautiful and challenging, tiring and invigorating, peaceful and mildly chaotic. It can be stressful to find your groove again, to create a new routine, and to stay humble and aware and grateful amidst all of the change. But then again, that’s our beautiful lifelong labour of love and we are really very lucky to be living it.

Inspiration | October 2

October 3, 2015

Last night my boyfriend and I started watching the Netflix Original Chef’s Table and were both so inspired. I can’t wait to watch the whole series – so many thoughts on passion, creativity, work ethic and motivation.

I’m really excited about the offerings of The Mindfulness Summit, there are so many important thinkers and inspiring people giving talks. Planning to sign up right after I finish writing this post!

Loved these 10 lessons learned from a year of productivity. His website looks like a treasure-trove of awesome information too, especially these 100 “hacks”. (Spoiler: productivity does not equal working so hard you burn out, his philosophy + the science indicate that it’s all about balance and working smarter.)

I really enjoyed and was inspired by two episodes of the Tim Ferriss podcast: one with Brené Brown and the other with Tara Brach.

Fellow Canadians: the election is coming! I love the CBC Vote Compass to see how your beliefs match with those of the parties. I also recently heard about the idea of strategic voting, and I find the idea fascinating (it sparked some great conversations in my family). Last thing: did you know that you can vote at any Elections Canada office at any time from now until the actual election day? That’s what I did before leaving for Ecuador. More info here.

Some wonderful ideas in this old (but new to me!) article from Brain Pickings.

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So I live in Quito now! When I arrived on Tuesday and was reunited with my lovely aforementioned boyfriend, we both felt like zero time had passed. We are living in a beautiful apartment with a gobsmacking view (though to be fair there’s a beautiful view from almost everywhere in Quito) and are very happy.

I hope you’re having a wonderful weekend! xo.