Life Lessons

Advice to Myself, Circa 2006

I’ve been sorting through old papers, letters, journal entries and photos. It’s all in an attempt to streamline my memories so my mom can start getting rid of things in my room, since I don’t live here anymore. Mostly, it’s been spurring a lot of nostalgia, along with a great big helping of laughter. We were so funny back then. We probably still are, but we don’t write the letters to commemorate it.

I was going through one of my old camp binders, and came across a strangely poignant list I’d written down on a random piece of paper. No date, no context. But it’s lovely. I thought maybe you’d appreciate it too. Warning: it’s equal parts useful and fluffy.

Get more hobbies. Do what you WANT. Be nice. Be enthusiastic. Be yourself. Be insane. Think before you speak. Try rock climbing. Get Bronze cross. Learn guitar much better. Rethink iPod music. Don’t care about boys. Love yourself. Write all the time. Run. Get buff! Hang out with your family. Always learn new things.

Care. Try. Sing. Improve personal style. Buy tons of shoes. Be less obsessive. Don’t care so much about the little stuff. Be interesting. Eat more of what you want. Be close with who you love. Improve personal hygiene. Keep promises. Keep secrets. Keep friends. Always smile. Feel beautiful. Learn more piano.

Work hard. Play harder. Kiss for fun. Be the person you want. Practice your music. Take care of yourself. LAUGH. Love music. Don’t be high maintenance. Try out for cheerleading. Be cute. Be hot. Be friends with boys. Don’t be selfish. Never give up. Grow. Do things you’re scared of, always. Always have fun. Meet new people. Find things that make you happy.

Love your body. Use your body. Carpe Diem. Take pictures. Be inspired. Follow through. Be creative. Remember. Take camping trips. Learn to sail and canoe. Love life. Don’t be so bitchy.

Missing the Train

Don’t worry, I’m not going to craft any sweeping metaphors. Well, maybe I will. I lied, I probably will. But I can’t help it. This blog is all about growing up and getting happy, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned on my journey so far, it’s that you’ve gotta slog through a mountain of crap to get to the good. And learning hard lessons tends to be kind of dramatic, which leads to some artsy fartsy metaphors. So sue me.

I missed my train.

Despite checking and re-checking that my alarm was set properly last night (because I’m neurotic like that), it didn’t go off. Despite the fact that it’s woken me up for countless exams and classes, it sat silently and let me sleep a few more hours.

Yeah, I panicked. Yeah, I might have hyperventilated and ugly-cried for a few minutes, attempting to reach my mom, who was in her happy place at a zen tai chi class somewhere. I certainly wasn’t in my happy place. The opposite, in fact!

I learned two important things:

1. I am my harshest critic.

Does this sound familiar to anyone? Because I don’t know about you, but I can really give myself hell sometimes. Before I’d even had time to think through the situation, my brain was in overdrive, berating me for being so dumb as to oversleep and miss a train, worrying about how I was going to get home, freaking out about what my family would say and generally just beating myself up. 

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What National Novel Writing Month Taught Me

Photo thanks to Vintage Tartlette

It was completely surreal to hit 50,062 words last Wednesday. I finished my book while sitting in a comfy Starbucks armchair, just as the store was closing, serenaded by festive holiday music. I just typed my 1320 words, finished up my story, and that was it. It was so…BIZARRE.

I learned a ton from this experience, both about myself and about writing. Below, my insights:

1. Do What Works For You

I was disciplined enough to do my 1600+ words a day (even though some days I hated every second), so that I was always right on schedule. Staying on schedule was remarkably (and disconcertingly) easy. It was odd. If I forced myself to do it, no matter what, I was always hitting the little progress bar, and slowly but surely it crept up to tens of thousands of words. By the time the last two days rolled around, I wasn’t scrambling or stressing. I just wrote my daily quota, again, for the 30th time.

Now I’m not suggesting that my way of completing this crazy month was superior, but it was really the only way I personally could have done it. I guess to a certain extent I need to be meticulous. I knew that if I fell behind, I would never catch up, because with everything else going on I wouldn’t be able to devote hours in a day to binge writing.

I guess you could describe my writing style as organized. I know Gabrielle, when she gets into her story, can write thousands of words in just a few days – she’s overcome with the passion of writing. And while I admire that, love that, wish I was like that…for now I know what works for me is putting one foot in front of the other. I hope that one day I can become consumed by my stories and write like the wind, but for now I’m proud that I even carve out the time to let myself write creatively. Which brings me to my next point…

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The Getaway Car by Ann Patchett

The other day, at the library, without even fulling intending to…

I read a whole book in one sitting.

Not to worry – I didn’t shirk all my school responsibilities and spend hours of my day reading for pleasure. In fact, it was only about 60 pages long; a short little swim in a pool of fresh new ideas.

You see, I’m rounding the bend on NaNoWriMo: I’m at that part in the cross-country race where you can actually see the finish line after so many miles of just keeping your head down and working hard. I have 3 days and 4,083 words to go. Unbelievable. I’m also turning the corner at school too – I have only a few days left of classes, and the papers and finals are piling up. My teeth are still hurting (I think I may be suffering from the awful dry socket), I’m spending much too much of my life at the library, and (of course) I need to do laundry.

The point is, I am (like we all are) busy. Stressed. With all the things we need to fit into the day, there isn’t usually much time left over for what we want to do. And if you’re me, what you want to do is have more time to read.

Enter Byliner Originals! This is such an awesome idea: short, concise little digital books, about 60 pages and $1-3 dollars each. Inside is a new perspective, an idea, an opinion or a story. Many outlets for eReaders are selling them for devices, but they’re also equally able to be read online in web format. The first I read was a great memoir on writing by Ann Patchett…

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