Advice – Page 7 – Life In Limbo

How To Survive Exam Season, Part 3

December 8, 2011

It’s that time of year again folks: the blasted exam crunch time. Previously, I’ve written about how to stay physically healthy and how to find the study system that works for you. This year’s edition is more focused on mental health and stress-reduction strategies. Intrigued? Read on!

I find that this time of year requires a lot of discipline, focus, and motivation. Those things aren’t always easy to find, especially not when you also feel frazzled, stressed, and probably lonely. But finding time for fun activities can be so insanely hard, especially when you always have this looming dark cloud hanging over you, telling you “YOU SHOULD BE STUDYING RIGHT NOW”. How oppressive! I’m sure a lot of you are nodding in agreement – there’s always this sense of obligation or duty to be studying, and even taking an hour to catch up with someone at Starbucks feels very wrong.

The more we’re isolated, the more awful we feel; but the more we take time off from studying, the guiltier we feel. Stress central! Here are some of the strategies I’ve been exploring to stay sane this exam season.

…

How To Survive Exam Season, Part 3Read More »

Be Who You Are, Not Who You Wish You Were

October 31, 2011

First off: a caveat. I don’t mean to suggest that there’s something wrong with having aspirations for yourself. Dreams, hopes, future plans, blueprints of your mansion in the Canary Islands – whatever. It’s a beautiful thing to be inspired by life, to be looking forward to things, to wish something for yourself that you don’t currently possess.

There’s also nothing wrong with adjusting your current behaviours in the hopes of becoming a better you, to say no to activities you might enjoy but know are unproductive (like countless hours of watching TV, for example!) or make yourself do the hard work that will get you where you need to be.

The real problem arises wherever we attempt to mold ourselves into somebody else. When our plans for ourselves don’t match up with our true values, personalities or skills. When we’re operating under a script for our “ideal” self that just doesn’t jibe with who we really are or what truly makes us happy.

Where we get these useless scripts differs from person to person: perhaps they’re sourced from our perceived (or real) parental expectations, our jealousy of a friend, our information from the media of what constitutes beauty or achievement, or our lack of self-reflection. It’s useful to try and isolate the sources of your ineffective scripts, confront them, and keep them in mind as you move through your life.

…

Be Who You Are, Not Who You Wish You WereRead More »

Shifting Your Focus

September 13, 2011

Here’s something I’m sure you can all relate to: sometimes I freak out.

Sometimes I worry about myself: how I’m dressed, where I’m going in life, my grades, my comportment. I throw pity parties, on occasion, and whine about how hard my life is (read: not at all) to anyone who will listen. I get into “moods” and at times conduct myself in the manner so succintly outlined on the First World Problems Twitter page.

And while it might sound stupid or dramatic or ridiculous, I really have been struggling lately with living too much inside my own head, thinking too much about my own worries and fears. I’m sure you can all agree that once you’re in a mood, the funk is dark and twisty and it can be fairly hard to bounce back. Developing coping techniques to deal with such moods is not an easy task, even for the most confident among us.

On the other hand, though: I have to remember to count my blessings. And I have so many of them to count. Which is why my favourite new coping technique is about shifting my focus to others.

Here’s the idea: start thinking about anyone but yourself. Anyone. Put them at the center of your thought target and fire away! What resonates most with me personally is the idea of making someone’s day, and helping people in my life as much as possible. Maybe you’d prefer joining in with a protest that moves you, contributing to a charity you believe in, volunteering for a local organization that does great work, or sending letters to the people that you love. Maybe you just want to start collecting smiles, or hugs that you helped create.

…

Shifting Your FocusRead More »

How To Read More Books: My #1 Online Motivation Tool

August 17, 2011

I’m an avid reader. It’s one of my very favourite activities, and it has enriched my life in many more ways than I can enumerate. Books have given me many gifts, chief among them my vocabulary, my understanding of the world, my conversation topics, and – more likely than not – my love of writing.

It physically pains me when people say that a) they don’t like to read, or b) they don’t have time. If you lean more towards a) – I am sad for you. You don’t know what you’re missing! Maybe you’re not reading the right things. Don’t be afraid to try a different genre (sci-fi, culture studies, romance?) of book, or format (short stories, choose-your-own-adventure?). I’m sure there’s a story out there that will grip you, shake you, and spit you back out utterly changed. (In a good way, if that wasn’t immediately obvious).

As for those who agree with statement b)..Codswallop! There’s time. Believe it, there’s time. (Read more about how to make time for your passions.) Are you watching TV while you eat? Could be reading. Are you listening to music on your commute? Could be reading. Are you paying attention in class? Could be reading. (Totally kidding.) There is, of course, the possibility that you’d rather not be reading, and if so: I redirect you to the paragraph above.

For now, let’s operate on the principle that you’d like to be reading, but you can’t find the motivation to make it a priority. Trust me, for all my love of the written word, I can totally understand this notion. More often than I’d like to admit, my books get tossed aside in favour of my shiny, interactive, exciting laptop. And even though I have these insane goals, like read 100 books in 2011, sometimes I shrug them off, and watch MasterChef instead.

So! How did I, a distractable fool of a girl, manage to read 32 books in 32 weeks this year?

…