One of the hardest lessons I’ve had to learn since “becoming an adult” [read: moving out without any idea of what I’m doing] is how to get up, stand up. For myself, that is.
This article is for you if you’re afraid of confrontation. Worried about rocking the boat. Unsure of how to approach someone with a complaint. Let me start by saying: I sure am. All of the above. Yes and yes and yes. I don’t like conflict, confrontation, or making a scene. Hence, I steer clear. I ignore. I bottle up. I seethe frustration when I’m alone or to anyone who will listen.
This weekend in particular was enlightening. Turns out, I did something to annoy my roommate. I was discourteous. It bugged her. So she confronted me. Dearie me, is it really so easy as that? All this time, could I have just shot off an angry text, had a conversation, problem solved? Who knows. But as we sat down to talk about it, all the things I’d never said came bubbling out, fueled by frustration. I quickly realized how absurd it was that I had been bottling these things up for so long, that I should have said something at the time.
Of course, coming to this realization and implementing confrontational behaviour in the future are two very different things. Although I’ve learned my lesson, that doesn’t mean that I’m an expert at applying it. All I can share with you today are the thoughts I’ve been having about how to make it easier for myself (and you!).